The Coronation of a Super Hero!...

It isn't often you have the feeling of awesomeness dawn upon you! This December day awesomeness 'dawned' one early afternoon on a cold and freezing sidewalk. That made my day. No, made several days after that! So, we were working crazy hours - and couple of my colleagues were so glued to their seats that they grew roots and couldnt "uproot" themselves for the "lunch ceremony" as i would often term it for them. And since i would jump at any given chance to step out, i offered to go on the ceremonial walk and get lunch for them. 


So i went in and ordered lunch - now the reader would be kind enough to note that it was three boxes of lunch in my hand, stacked one above the other and a glass of chilled iced tea in my hand that i sipped occasionally while walking because there was nothing else to do! And as i go about doing this nice balancing act and begin to think it's about time to hum or whistle a tune (not that i do a good job of it) the phone rings. Well, i have to now use my neck and trap the phone between the neck and the shoulder to talk as i balance the lunch boxes and tea and walk towards the office building.

And as i get into an animated discussion on the phone (now that i imagine, i would have been looking really funny! :D ...), i saw a lady approaching in my general direction and likely to cross paths. She gave a smile from afar or maybe she had a smiling face. But i noticed as she drew nearer she smiled more - errr, was she amused by my appearance. Like a juggler or something? Lunch boxes, iced tea, phone and the weird stance? Ahem! Was she... She smiled bigger as she crossed me and i heard the faint giggle as she walked past... and said, "My son would have loved to see you!.."

Now, now! I stopped dead in my track. I was like :-o ... (no, but i couldnt actually shake my head in that stance!..) did she just laugh at me? Was that supposed to mean that am a circus clown or something like that? I stopped and thought and was beginning to turn around to see. And that very moment she kept going a couple of steps and turned around too and with a warm, genuine smile continued, "He would have loved seeing you. My son, he likes super heroes :) ..."

if i were to use some fairness cream in my early 20s.. maybe.. just maybe, someone might have seen me blush at that statement :D well, i did sport a camouflaged blush :D ....and i replied with a grinning "Thank you..." and turned and walked the rest of the way smiling. I spent the whole day smiling.... in between, i also checked. i was still wearing all my garments in the proper sequence and order...A super hero? Gee!...and i thought she implied i was a clown or some funny looking guy....

...so often we interpret said and unsaid things (both spoken and written) in our own ways. We condition ourselves to be receptive to communication the way we like it. I was being called a super hero and i was thinking she was laughing at me. If i hadnt stopped.. if that lady hadn't stopped and completed, i would have spent all day thinking i made a fool of myself. That one statement changed it all. I was happy and in great spirits all day, all week and when i think of that incident now, it still makes me smile.

i am me. i am a super hero for someone. so are all of you! :)

04:40 A.M, 01/01/2010

...and am still not sleepy!

i am not partying.
i am not watching a movie.
i am not reading a book...
i am not facebooking, orkutting, and likes...
i am not talking on the phone.

...but i am excited :-) i don't know about what and why. Maybe the new year brou-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha.. (after ho-ho-ho, we should give ha-ha-ha a chance, right? ;-) ....) but i rang in the new year quietly. Went to Church with folks and came back home for a nice cup of coffee, some conversations, big time SMS-ing, clicking the "once-in-a-blue-moon" and now, here...

What could possibly be the reason i am awake?
Strange guy?
You think so?
Definitely. Ain't sleepy. Ain't doing anything. Is visibly (or invisibly) excited and still doesn't know the reason why!
True :D

No complaints from the past year. All the ups and downs summed up, i still am on the positive side with the ups. Have had lovely people walk in to my life. And some lovelier people have stayed since long and wont leave easy :-P ... ah, rather, i wont leave 'em so easy! Had some interesting trips, clicks, and incidents. So much to recall. I can go on and on and on about the year gone by... but then, that's not the point :-)

Mr. hApPy oLd yEar - thangggue!
and Mr. Brand New, welgummmm!

i guess i know why i stayed up. gOod mOrning to me :-) and "Hello World" :-)

Tick Tick...

Sitting in the corner of his room, by the window – his faithful companion, by now, Ron stared out as he did everyday. That was his life now. To wake up in the morning with hardly four hours of sleep and then sit by the window and stare at the world going by. The world he was a part of, once. Technically, he’s still a part of it. But still, isn’t. Ron spends hours staring out of the window and sometimes his mind would venture out – and mingle with the crowd and be where all the action is! Those were the instances when his mind would go back to the time when he’d be not at the window straining to see what’s going on outside but he’d be right there where all the action was! And there would be some other man, somewhere who’d look at him and reminisce of his youth. He was a part of the cycle and he knew it well and he accepted it. Just that sometimes some things reminded him of the days when he could still trek atop the steepest mountains, cycle on and on, pack his bags within no time and set off to explore places he’d never seen and chatter endlessly with his friends. Everything could have been the same but for time. It keeps ticking away. It had ticked away his childhood, his youth, his middle-age, the dark hair, the pearly whites, his smiles, and heartbreakingly, his friends. It still kept ticking. In the numb silence of his room he could listen to his wrist watch ticking away and he glanced down to have a look at it.

The wrist watch! A mere look at it brought a faint smile on his face. It was long time ago when the wrist watch first marked time for him. It still did. His lips trembled as he smiled and with his fingers he gently felt it. As his fingers touched and felt the wristwatch, he thought he was falling through the dial. But he wasn’t afraid of that fall. He was glad that he was falling. There was a sense of happiness, a sense of belonging to that fall. Ron’s eyes were closed and his face had a serene smile – one that had not adorned his face for a while now. He found himself in a familiar room where a guy was sleeping like a log. He looked carefully – it was Ron. But Ron was him. He was back in time, he realized and that put him to sleep.

He could hear his mobile ringing – louder by the second. That told him it was the alarm. He reached out for his phone and turned off the alarm and switched off the phone! What a bliss, Ron thought as he drifted back to sleep. The bliss didn’t last for long though, as he heard loud bangs on his door. He could also hear familiar phrases now and then, kamine, kutte, wake up, what the hell are you doing?... He dragged himself to the door and as soon as he opened, his friends started barking. Eh? Well, “barking”, is what he tells ‘em they are doing if his friends are shouting at him!

Ron, you insane insaan! You have to be late everywhere you go! Tell me one place where you’ve reached on time!, challenged an agitated Manoj. And as cool as he ever was, Ron replied, Come on Manu! I always reach my bedroom on time to sleep like a dog. Err em, I mean, a log! All of them burst out laughing. Dudes, listen, I have a reputation to keep. So, kindly adjust!, Ron announced. Rohan shot back, Reaching late everywhere, every time – consistently! Is that what you call re-pu-ta-tion? Ron did not have an answer to this. Instead he grinned the famous Ron-grin! He was feeling special and he knew Rohan and Manoj were here to take him to where all their other friends where – at Seema’s place. All of them had planned to gather at Seema’s to celebrate Ron’s birthday. Yes it was Ron’s Happy Birthday! All his friends never trusted him to be on time – so they sent Rohan and Manoj to drag him to Seema’s house.

As soon as Ron entered Seema’s house, he heard so many barks! All of them barking at the same time “Happy Birtday to You…” and pouncing on him to hug him and kick him! Many moments passed by and so many kicks, laughs, smiles, and bouts of laughter. And suddenly all of them fell silent. A stark realization hit all of them at the same time – this was probably the last time they’d be together as a group. Some of them were moving to a different city, some to a different country, and some to a different life – getting married. The moments, minutes, hours, days, hours, months, and years they had spent together – that period of time was coming to an end. Their eyes were filled with tears of joy, sorrow, and the pain of separation writ large, looming on their faces. Seema was the first to go. She cried, bawled like a child. Manju followed suit. Manoj, Rohan, and Abhi stood still. Not speaking. Not looking at each other. Ron broke the silence and the tears, Guys, where’s my happy birthday gift? I want one right now! His child like antics as he jumped around everyone asking for a gift brought smiles back followed by bouts of laughter as Seema brought out a gift-wrapped box and all of them posed for photographs as a group with their cam in the self-timer mode. Say paneeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeer, someone shouted and all of them broke into another bout of laughter *Click*!

Ron opened the pack slowly. He had an inkling what the gift would be and it turned out to be that. A beautiful wrist watch! Manju shouted above the din, Ron, atleast reach your first day at work on time now! You don’t have an excuse now. You have a brand new wrist watch to keep time! Her voice trailed into another bout of laughter. Laughter was one thing that bound them together even through their tears! Ron thought of the gift. Apart from being a sarcasm-filled humor, it meant a lot more to all of them in the context. It was a rememberance – to remember the times they spent together, the moments of joy and happiness, of sorrows and pain – all shared between them. It marked the moment they’d go their separate ways. He held the watch close to his ears to hear the pleasant tick tick… But that pleasant sound was interrupted by excited shouts from below Ron’s window. His thoughts broke and he was pulled back into the present. Now. He looked out of the window again and spotted a group of youngsters laughing and walking together enjoying the silly comments and jokes that came their way.

Ron wondered - where did those days go? Why am I here? Why cannot those days last forever? Where are all my friends now? Why did it have to end like this?... Those thoughts were too much for Ron to take. He closed his eyes. There was a smile on his face, which was not a smile actually. It was something more, something less. The room grew quieter. His breathing, deeper. He could hear the wrist watch tick away, tick, tick tick… He could almost hear his heartbeats too. And then, his heart stopped beating.

The wrist watch kept ticking away – tick, tick, tick, tick…

Of Rickshaw-Wallahs and Graffiti...

Spotting graffiti on rickshaws is not a very uncommon thing. Most of us would have spotted our own share of strikingly funny and serious graffiti inside the rickshaws and on its exteriors too. I added to my share of rickshaw graffiti spotting the other day as i was leaving for work. As soon as i crossed the road to hail for a rick what caught my attention was a parked rickshaw and the word "girls" on it. That made me look at it again. And that second dragged my feet to the rick. And that closer inspection made me involuntarily take out my mobile and click a close-up of the graffiti. It read thus:

"I HET THE GIRLS"? Strange. I began looking for a logical correction - "hit" seemed to be logical. Maybe the rickshaw-waalah was from the league of extraordinary romeo-men! And we have the global excuse that English is a funny language - therefore the spelling mistake was forgiven him. So this rickshaw-wallah romeo (RR) was hitting on girls and publicly announcing it too? In short, he was directly telling all girls that he's hitting on 'em and all us guys that he's hitting on all girls right under our noses? Crap! No, that can't be it! I thought i needed to look for a better logical correction to that misspelt word. Ahem!

Now i had to look at it from a different perspective. So i stepped back and looked at the "bigger picture". And thus it spoke:

If you look closely, there's a second line of graffiti below the current line that's under discussion. You might not be able to read the second line clearly. It reads "Maut Ki Raftar", which would mean "Speed of Death" when translated literally. And a logical explanation would mean "i drive at the speed of death". Some guy! So i assumed that the RR wanted to write "I HATE (THE) GIRLS"

To sum it up, his graffiti reads:

"I HATE THE GIRLS

MAUT KI RAFTAR"

So this RR could also be called a Rejected Romeo (again, RR!) Rejection in love might have caused him to hate all girls and maut ki raftar might be either his style or his skill or whatever he feels it is. I did not have time to ponder too much. Before long, another rick stopped in front of me and i got into it murmuring "i HET to go to work..." ;-)

On a parting note - an incident that my aunt narrated to me. My aunt works in Gujarat and is nearing "senior citizenship". She was traveling by a rickshaw to a nearby place and she was startled by something she spotted on the rickshaw driver's head. So she asked him urgently "Bhaiiya, aapke sar par kaunsa operation hua hai. Sab thik to hai? Ye kitne stitiches lage hain?" The rickshaw guy laughed for a bit (much to the annoyoment of my aunt) and said "Aunty ji, this is my new hairstyle a la Aamir Khan style" :-D

The Belt, The Bouquet, and The Bride...

Soothing! Romantic! - that's what Danny thought when he heard John Denver's "Leaving on a jet plane...". Don't know what it was - maybe the roar of the engines of the jet plane - but Dan jumped out of his bed all of a sudden and in doing so, he nearly fell all over the place. He just realized that he was sleeping and John Denver was singing to him through his Mobile phone's alarm tone! He dragged his feet to the corner of the room and was standing in front of the mirror not knowing whether to laugh at his face or admire the not so tall, not so dark, and not so handsome looks ;-) He did not have to think much, for he glanced at the big clock hanging in his room and it screamed right at his face, “9:30”. You should have seen the look on his face. I don't know how to describe it. But it looked like thunder, lighting, and constipation stuck him at the same time!

Danny ran and what a run it was – he could have run straight into the Beijing Olympics stadium and they wouldn’t have asked him for a qualification run or credentials and such. He dashed straight to the bathroom and was out of it in record time! Again, if there was an event – maybe some kind of “bath-and-other essentials-athalon”, our Danny would have set a world record. His mother was surprisingly amused at his antics and asked him, Beta, what are you doing? Are you ok? He replied, Maria, mummy!! Maria!!! Her mom wants to meet me today at 11 and its 9:30 already. Where are my socks? My shoes? My belt?....What am I gonna do?, his voice trailed off as he ran in all directions to find his clothing and accessories.

Maria – the very name brought a sparkle in his eye, a spring in his step, and dreams in his sleep. Talk about the name that launched a thousand dreams! But right now, the same name caused more than a spring in his step as he jumped all around his room – getting ready to meet Maria’s mom. He rehearsed his dialogues in front of the mirror and again caught a glimpse of his not so tall, not so dark, and not so handsome being. The same big clock now stuck ten times even as Danny jumped with every gong! 10 am? Danny shook his head faster than what a rotating table fan would if it did so at the speed of light.

The belt! Where’s the belt? He dug his bag to find out where his belt was and as he dug with exasperation, he had a flashback – it was Friday and his friend at office had forgotten her belt at home. She was having a tough time managing without a belt and asked Danny if he had a spare one. He usually traveled back home on Fridays and he did have a spare belt in his bag. He removed his best formal belt and gave it to her and he wore the spare casual one and that’s how he traveled home that day. And as the law of Murphy would have it, Danny forgot all about the belt until the next morning when he needed it the most! Chaos. That’s one word that’d have described his state of mind. He had a brilliant brainwave in the meanwhile – he thought to himself, I will wear this casual belt – with its end hanging around my waist – and go to a shop and buy a nice new belt on my way to Maria’s home! He added a thought, as an afterthought, Dan, you’re a genius!

Danny almost flew out of his door as he darted with destination “Maria” in his mind. He hopped onto a rickshaw and barked out directions to the annoyed rickshaw driver. Post-barking, he realized that he still had to get the belt! To the further annoyance of the rickshaw driver, Danny asked him to stop, paid him and stormed a store with his barking Belt, belt, belt! Show me all nice belts you have! The guy at the store gave him the don’t-get-excited-its-just-a-belt look. That look gave Danny the feeling of being hit below the belt! Eureka. Now he knew what the phrase hitting under the belt meant! Well, he thought so. The store guy laid out an array of belts out of which Danny picked up a decent one and announced that he’d take it. He quickly strapped the belt around his waist and indicated where he’d want punches to dock the belt on his waist. The guy at the store set off punching the belt and he acted as if he was drilling a hole in hard rock! And he made faces – crazy faces like Dan had never seen before. And the time was running out… it was already nearing 10:20!!!! Danny’s famous bark surfaced again as he barked at the guy to show him another belt that he could just snap on! Out came the snap-on belt, which Danny boy grabbed and put it around his waist, packed the other belt in a bag and marched out of the shop!

The Bouquet! Yes, the bouquet! Danny, you’re truly a genius!, he thought again as he planned he would give a bouquet to Maria’s mother who, in turn, will get impressed and marvel at the thoughtfulness of her prospective future “son-in-law”! Danny hopped into a rickshaw and asked the driver to halt at the very first sight of a florist. He hopped out of the rick, skipped up to the florist, grabbed the biggest bouquet he’d see and jumped back into the rick. Quarter to eleven and he was still about half of a sand-box away from her house and the huge bouquet wasn’t helping either! A windy day and the rick moving fast – would have been heartily welcome on a hot and sultry day like this but Danny wasn’t in a mood to welcome even the hint of a breeze. He had a tough time guarding the flowers against the breeze and he was sure by the time he reached his destination, they’ll look like they were picked off either from somebody’s house or from a graveyard! Gulp! Danny gulped so loud that the poor driver jumped with fright. But one look at Dan’s face, and the driver changed his mind of giving a piece of his own to Danny boy. It was half-past eleven when Danny stepped out of the rick with the bouquet and his old belt in hand. He looked skywards and smiled. He adjusted his hairstyle – not that he had a great one but he wanted to be presentable.

The Bride! The very thought brought back the spring in his step and the smile on his face. Upwards, ahoy! – He seemed to shout as he entered the elevator and pressed the button that would teleport him or some such, into Maria’s house. He rang the bell and waited on with his best smile. The best smile he’d ever seen in his life greeted his as Maria opened the door. Hurriedly he removed his shoes as he entered her house. There! There she goes – err, comes – he saw Maria’s mom coming towards him and he was ready with the bouquet and a smile. This is for you, Aunty, said Danny as he bowed – just at the right angle and presented the bouquet to Maria’s mom. After a few formalities that saw them exchange pleasantries, they got down to talking about the serious issue at hand. The question was – why did the boy with the belt and the bouquet deserve the bride? We won’t get into the details of the discussion that happened there for Danny told me he wants those discussions to stay where they happened. With all due respect to Danny and Maria, let me send Danny back home :-) but not before telling you that Danny did keep the belt with him. The bouquet was gone. The bride was too, almost. In his heart he knew they both will be bride and groom, one day…

The boy with the belt and the bouquet (which was no longer his) sat in the bus (no rick this time) traveling back home thinking about the bride (to be). His thoughts sang a lullaby to him as he drifted into a peaceful sleep oblivious of the noise of an entire metropolitan city around him. There was a serene look on his face that always expected the best to happen and believed that whatever happened – happened for the best. An old, wise lady traveling in the same bus saw Danny sleeping like a kid and she thought, what a cute little kid. Little did she know how this very kid went through the day and what happened with the belt, the bouquet and the bride…

David Antony,

28/05/2008

Mr. Green Shirt & His MBA…

Axe, Rexona, Nivea, Brut, and some nameless deodarants – I could smell all of ‘em and some varieties that I could not recognize. Traveling in a crowded Mumbai train could make you quite a pro in sniffing out deos – not because you want to but because you have to. You don’t have a choice! I am not writing about going on a deo sniffing spree but about Mr. Green Shirt and his MBA…

I was traveling in a local train headed for a suburban station in Bombay and the peak hour crowd was traveling with me or I with them? Does it matter? Nothing matters while you are traveling in the Mumbai local trains as long as you reach your destination. But a li’l something that matters to me is listening to conversations and this day too I happened to lend my ears to an interesting one. Mr. Green Shirt, oblivious of his surroundings, was (with due respect to him) barking on the phone to another ear that was willing to so generously listen to him. To the count of that one ear he added so many others with his barking.

The conversation began with the usual Dude what’s up – nothing much – what about you greetings and pleasantries. The ear at the other end which also had a mouth for company asked, I guess, What are you doing these days?- To which, our protagonist announces, MBA. An element of surprise from the other end - Kya? (what?). Haan yaar, I thought I will do an MBA – bore ho raha tha! So Mr. Green Shirt decides to do an MBA because he is generally bored. Talk about hobbies! The barking resumed again, this time with the details of his MBA – No no, am doing it from a private university. And I don’t have to attend classroom sessions. The ear at the other end is totally confused now and fields him with a barrage of questions. Mr. Green Shirt is calm and cool as always and he embarks on an elaborate explanation. Actually there is this guy who’s arranging an MBA for me. I just need to pay him 40k and I will have an MBA degree in my hands. And no I need not attend classroom sessions. The ear and the mouth might have gasped in unison. Mr. Green Shirt tried to cover up. Actually, I told that guy – it isn’t right and I don’t want a degree without putting in efforts. So he’s agreed to give me the MBA for 21K. I still don’t have to attend classroom sessions. I just need to go and write the exams and he will give me the degree. I guess there was another round of exclamations (if not expletives) from the mouth on the other end. Mr. Green Shirt has answers to all questions! Yes, I didn’t feel it right and ethical to get a degree by just giving money and that’s why I agreed to write the exam. And MBA is not such a big thing. What do they teach in an MBA course? What will they teach me? I know everything about management. I have been working for 3 years now and I have learnt all about management. Its all very simple! To a request from the other end - Green Shirt replies: Oh you also want an MBA. Yes, I will talk to that guy and bargain the rates. Hey, my station is approaching and I need to get down. I will talk to you later about the MBA. Bye!

Two stations went by and Mr. Green Shirt’s “approaching” station never approached. Meanwhile, he got another phone call. He picked up the phone and to some question from the other end, he replied, MBA! Am doing my MBA…

In my mind I congratulated Mr. Green Shirt for his achievements and got out of the train. The train moved on and so did Mr. Green Shirt and his MBA…

O Butterfly, why did you flap your wings?

O Butterfly, why did you flap your wings?

I never knew such a term existed and was blissfully unaware of the term till this date (would like to note that the state of blissfulness hasn’t changed a bit after knowing this term too – so it isn’t quite a bliss-changing episode of my life...) – there I digress again! So what I was getting to was that I was unaware of this term till date and would have been so unless I came across it in an article and it intrigued me and I set upon its trail and… - ok enough of conjunctions now - get back to your senses Mr. David – flip! I forgot I don’t have any… Alright then, get back to your nonsense! (that sounds so much better..) So returning back to my nonsense: “the phenomenon whereby a small change at one place in a complex system can have large effects elsewhere, e.g., a butterfly flapping its wings in Rio de Janeiro might change the weather in Chicago” – well, that’s what the phrase “butterfly effect” means as per Wikipedia: (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Butterfly_effect)

…and you thought I phrased that cryptic definition? (that would be expecting a tad too much from me! ;-) …). So why am I writing this? Who knows! Maybe a butterfly flapped its wings in Bombay J Don’t you think I fool around too much without actually speaking any sense? I think the same! And all great minds _____ (fill in the blanks). Why should I complete the sentence every time for you? :-P Why don’t you use your great mind sometimes?

Well, whether we term/call them butterflies or not – the fact is true that there are such butterflies, myriads of them that cross (or don’t cross) our paths knowing or unknowingly and most of them when they flap their wings going about their routine life – in some remote way – affect ours. Do you think that a butterfly flaps its wings thinking that it has to consciously? Of course, no! It has to it has to because it needs to fly! It is something that comes naturally to a butterfly! So if something bad happens in your life – that is not because of a bad or naughty butterfly. There are no good or bad butterflies in this world. Each one flaps its wings because it has to – to stay alive, to smile, to laugh, to cry, to kill, to save, to love, to hate…

So the next time you see something bad (why do we always blame the bad things that happen to us on others/other things and take the credit for good things? –I know the answer to this!! Its Triple Is - Insane Insaan’s Instincts? – for the uninitiated and the ignorant – Insaan = Human being) happening in your life, know that a butterfly flapped it’s wings somewhere!! And lo behold a butterfly has transformed into a goat err.. em, I mean scapegoat :-D

O butterfly why doth thou flappeth thy wings?
One such day, long time ago, thou flapped thy wings…
And I heard a canary sing…
And I don’t know why, when, how,
I fell, I fell in Love…